Office (Printer) Abuse On The Rise

You no doubt have one lurking in your office right now. This very minute. It's just sitting there, waiting to ruin your day.

Waiting to ruin your deal.

Oh sure, everything is fine now. It's perfectly capable now, when you don't need it. But just try and use it when it's a matter of life and death and see how far you get.

Don't get angry. Remain calm. I should warn you, hitting it only makes it stronger.

And may God have mercy on your soul if you are out of cyan.

Is there any one piece of machinery that has caused more suffering than the office printer? Their revolutionary roots trace back to 1440, but with the amount of errors, paper jams, and just plain idiocy rampant in today's modern printers, you'd think they were designed by Steve Guttenberg and not Johannes Gutenberg.

As the Wall Street Journal discusses today, workplace abuse against printers is on the rise. Normally, abuse would not be tolerated, but the victims in this case had it coming.

But don't fear, dear agent. We at DotLoop have a solution for you. One that does not require Q0061z print cartridges or misaligned paper or the need to wait while the printer warms up.

Of course, I'm talking about paperless transactions, the office printer's only true nemesis. So take heart, fellow office workers, and know that your days of ink-stained neckties and blouses is over.

So stop letting your office printer ream you and get your negotiations done digitally.

You can leave your bat at home.